I knew her to be the bright light
the spunky
the ferocious
the radiant
With sunflowers dancing in her hair
And patchworks of stories and song
It faded the night a wild summer began
red lights, loud music, who knew?
And yet we were all told of it
few unnoticeable sunsets later
and before long, her hand repeatedly returned to the bottle a translucent vessel to devastation
wastage
destruction
time and time again
It repeats itself, cycles over, each time more menacing than the last
Til the body gives out
Til it is no more
Til the girl I knew
Is the girl no more
~
these mornings, her windowsill is bright
Folded cards of vibrant drawings
Painted pots of daffodils and ferns
Through a crinkled blue gown
I can see that see will still be
The sunflower I knew
Author’s note:
This poem was written with the intention of emphasizing that recovery is possible, and regaining oneself after struggling with substance abuse is attainable. The initial draft for the poem was written after my friend was hospitalized after an overdose, and she was restricted to a hospital bed for months. It felt like every attempt I made to help was futile, until I witnessed her progress and realized that recovery was certainly achievable. I hope that this inspires other youth to support their friends, those who may be struggling, and those who may be at their breaking point. Be there for them, and never give up on your friends.
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Grace Zhou is currently a high school senior in Alberta, Canada. She is a writer and visual artist whose work has been featured in TeenInk Magazine, Blossom Magazine, and many more. She is also on the executive team of The Healthy Minds Foundation, a youth organization aimed at providing mental health resources to all. Her passions range from film photography to still life painting and everything in between.
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